By now most of you know that I like to run. I like it for a lot of reasons. It's good exercise, it's good stress relief, and it gives me a small window of time where I'm alone with my thoughts. I always listen to my Casting Crowns or Contemporary Christian stations on Pandora while I run. I just get lost in the music and let my feet do the work. And, every once in awhile I run without music. On these days, I spend that time time either praying or just listening to what God has to say to me.
But, since October, I think I've run a grand total of 4 times. (Pretty impressive, huh?) I've wanted to go more than that, but there was always a reason why I didn't...too tired, too busy, too cold, too late... Personally, I like to refer to these "reasons" as excuses. That's all they are. If I had really wanted to run, I would've gotten off my backside and done it! The really sad part is that I actually ran a half-marathon at the end of October! I was going to take a week off after that, but that week turned into over 4 months!
Well, as of last week, I am officially staying at home and am no longer working. So, most of my excuses are just plain gone. I was actually really excited that I would be able to run pretty much every day. But, I was really sick last week. So, there was no way I could. I couldn't do much of anything except lay in bed. Over the weekend I started feeling better, so today I decided it was a good idea to go run.
I have a route that I follow that is right at 3 miles. I walked out of my neighborhood and started running. It didn't take very long before my lungs were saying, "Are you serious right now? You want us to do what??" I only made it a mile before I had to slow down and walk. I switched back and forth between walking and running for the second mile, then I just walked the third mile.
During that third mile, I was thinking, "Why did I even come out here? This is so stupid! One mile? That's all I can do? One mile???" I mean, four months ago I ran 13.1 miles without walking at all. And now, all I could do was run one mile. Sounds pretty pathetic, I know. But then I started thinking about the first time I ever ran (by choice) about 8 years ago. I was all excited that I ran half a mile! I was so proud of myself because I thought half a mile was such a long distance!
If you would have asked me that day if I ever thought I'd run a half marathon, I would have called you crazy! Even 3 years ago I would have said there was no way I'd ever be able to run that far. But, last summer I decided I was going to do it...and I did! But, here's the catch...I did NOT do it by myself. I had to call on God to help me throughout the entire process. On days when I didn't want to train, He helped me get out there. On days when I was hurt, He helped me get through it. On the day of the race, He gave me the strength to make it to the finish line. And, I am convinced to this day that He carried me for the first 6 miles. I wouldn't have been able to do it without Him. I just wouldn't have.
The whole point is that there are lots of things that we are able to do, even if we think we can't. When you call on God to help you, You have the power to do anything! You still have to put forth the work and effort. You still have to be dedicated to what you are doing. But He can absolutely turn the impossible into the possible. All you have to do is take that first step and ask Him to help you with the second step.
So, I don't think that God sees my miserable run today as the giant failure that I see it as. I think He sees it as a first step. It wasn't perfect. It wasn't fabulous. It wasn't even something I can believe I just admitted! But, it was a first step. If I stay committed to running and continue to ask Him to help me do it, I'll be running a full marathon before you know it!
No matter what it is that you are facing, don't make yourself face it alone! Ask God to help you and He will. Even if your attempts are so far from perfect you're ashamed to admit you tried! You can do it with His help. All you have to do is ask!
I can do all this through Him who gives me strength. ~Philippians 4:13
